Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Randomize
