Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
