I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
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