We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
