LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
