He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
