oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
