No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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