I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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