who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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