It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
