Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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