kristin has been a bad kristin
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
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