Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
