I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Never underestimate the power of titties
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
