how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
