Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
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We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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