i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
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