ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
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