Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Randomize
