he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
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