omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
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