Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
