i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
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Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
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I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
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