HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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