i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
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Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
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I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??