i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's