Texts From Last Night

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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.

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  (717): please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are. http://tfl.nu/a3si
  Replies (10) Good night (1328) Bad night (3760)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.

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  (402): I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had. http://tfl.nu/opb7
  Replies (54) Good night (9951) Bad night (803)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.

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  (910): And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship. http://tfl.nu/btcq
  Replies (17) Good night (4620) Bad night (1998)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?

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  (508): Why did you put hummus in my pillow case? http://tfl.nu/0gk1
  Replies (9) Good night (1431) Bad night (3137)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?

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  (832): Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday? http://tfl.nu/ynw6
  Replies (16) Good night (4554) Bad night (1446)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.

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  (910): I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome. http://tfl.nu/hxzm
  Replies (3) Good night (1742) Bad night (717)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"

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  (520): They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield" http://tfl.nu/wdyt
  Replies (8) Good night (2967) Bad night (761)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying

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  (609): Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying http://tfl.nu/j2oh
  Replies (8) Good night (2860) Bad night (921)
• Favorite

  (386): View more from Florida

  Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.

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  (386): Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole. http://tfl.nu/vrpb
  Replies (6) Good night (697) Bad night (2085)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.

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  (603): playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on. http://tfl.nu/nhak
  Replies (8) Good night (1532) Bad night (638)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.

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  (530): Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life. http://tfl.nu/z2vn
  Replies (6) Good night (1870) Bad night (590)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep

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  (503): There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep http://tfl.nu/pt1q
  Replies (6) Good night (513) Bad night (644)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.

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  (402): I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth. (402): Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering. http://tfl.nu/qwlh
  Replies (2) Good night (397) Bad night (339)
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH

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  (865): I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH http://tfl.nu/s3s4
  Replies (4) Good night (573) Bad night (271)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...

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  (519): It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it... http://tfl.nu/1qng
  Replies (0) Good night (240) Bad night (375)

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