I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
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