as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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