YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
