Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
that's an acceptable place to lick
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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