i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
