HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
