I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
