Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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