she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
We left the knife in your bed.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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