Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
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