No, you can still breathe under the balls.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
