I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.