I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Randomize