She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
