it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize