her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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