I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
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