Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
