I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
