My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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