Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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