Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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