I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
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